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My house is seriously a wreck. What else is new, right? I straightened up the living room, but you would never know it. The kitchen is atrocious. I'm pretty sure there are 2 dried up puddles of dog pee on the floor. Awesome. The sink is FULL of dishes, literally, and there are things in bags that need to be put away. Not food items, just stuff I bought for the baby. We have a shoe cubby in the foyer, but does anyone actually put their shoes in it? Negative. There's just stuff strewn about the house, but right now, I really don't care. I'm in a mood, and I'm tired, so these are problems that would best be resolved by Future Laura, because Present Laura doesn't give a shit.
I know what you must be thinking, society, and you're right. This is unsanitary and gross, and I'm an awful parent for having my child live in such filth. You wanna hire me a maid, society? That would be great. Then I could make my own show and call it "The Real Housewives of Delaware County." It would follow me and other women like me in this area who sit on our asses watching soaps and ordering the maids around. We would have our kids in the show, and we'd do things like take them shopping and throw them outlandish birthday parties, but otherwise, the nannies raise the kids and we just shop and go to lunch with our bestest girlfriends. Then we'll get breast implants on our day off from our days off. We'll sneak around with our cabana boys and landscapers while our husbands fly our private jets to foreign countries for business meetings about business.
Yep. That's what my show will be about. It's totally an original concept, no?
What was this post supposed to be about? I dunno. I'm tired, I'm rambling, and I'm surrounded by a mess that I'm trying ever so hard to ignore. It's not working. It's nearly 11pm on a Monday night. I'm over tired to the point where I'm no longer tired, and now the baby is crying...soooo...exit stage right. Have I confused you enough with this post? Yes? Good. I'll write a better entry when I feel like it. You're not the boss of me! Shut up!
Update: It's 12:04am, and I just finished the dishes, putting away baby stuff, loading the dishwasher, mopping the kitchen floor, straightening up the living room, AND cleaning the turtle tank. Housework is DONE, and now I'm going to bed. :-)